Thursday, October 30, 2008

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Week 7 Ho Stable: Kellen Winslow

The man at left should spend less time on the phone and more time on the field catchin' passes, scorin' touch downs, throwin' blocks or generally being productive.

17 yards sucks. Was he really a first round draft pick? How? Why? What? Will someone please put the browns out of their fucking misery?

Grow up, shut up, and sit your ass down Kellen Winslow!

Also, stop being a bitch! No one is going to call you because you have a Staph infection -- your wife and family care about you, your boss does not. All he cares about is you getting in the end zone, which apparently you are not any good at.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Week 6 Ho Stable: Eli Manning

Poor Eli Manning. I feel bad for Eli sometimes. Sure, he's a punk ass who threatened to go to law school rather than go play for the Chargers as the #1 draft pick. Waaah! What a douche! But you have to admit, it must suck being the second third best QB in your immediate family. Oh wait, there's another brother, so maybe fourth? I don't know.

Now, some genius Giants fan might stumble on this blog and say: "Now hold on! Eli is the reigning Super Bowl MVP, he must not suck." Wrong! The only reason the Giants won the Super Bowl is because Bill Belichek is a douche and a cheater cheater pumpkin eater. The Ragtag Giants winning was funny for pretty much everyone and having Eli be the MVP was the result of every star in the universe aligning at just the right moment and served as the ultimate Fuck You to Belichek from the cosmic force known as Karma.

No, Eli is not really MVP material. Yes, he's a douche. Yes, Eli needs to sit his ass down. Right now. 3 interceptions. 3 interceptions against the Browns. Hello, the Browns are from Ohio, where football goes to die. Yes, he had 196 passing yards, even more if you count all the yards the Browns players got on interception returns. This does not change his allegiance to sucking.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Week 6 Nominees

Your Week 6 nominees belong here and try to think out of the box people. Thanks.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Week 5 Ho Stable: Buffalo's Defense

This picture is the perfect illustration of why Buffalo's Defense and everyone person in it needs to sit down. It's old but the message is clear: the entire Buffalo Defense can't stop even one guy.

One. Damn. Guy. Hos Sit Down!

You are beyond terrible if you let the Arizona Cardinals score 41 points. Arizona. This brings up a number of questions: Has Arizona ever scored 41 points in the history of the franchise? How is Kurt Warner still playing? Wait, who knew that Kurt Warner is still alive? How is Arizona still a team? Do you all remember when Paris Hilton was dating Matt Leinart? Who knew that herpes made you play poorly?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Week 5 Nominees

Your mission, should you choose to accept it: Nominate someone for Week 5 who does not play for a team in Ohio and is not Sarah Palin. Good luck!

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Week 4 Ho Stable: Chris Perry

It is getting a little too easy to pick on players from Ohio teams over and over again - like picking on Sarah Palin easy. I think it is because teams in Ohio blow -- both pro and college. Probably high school too, I don't know? I'd put money on it.

I didn't even know who Chris Perry was until this week, but man it turns out he went to Michigan. I wonder if he thinks he is a fucking model too, like tweedle dee and tweedle twat? Probably. I am not picking on Michigan, I swear.

Welcome to the big leagues Chris! Word on the street is that rushing for 28 yards and still coughing up the football means you kinda suck. Maybe he could be McNabb's stunt double on McNabb's shittiest day? Or maybe he could double for Tiger Woods? From the looks of it, Chris is probably not good at golf either. Well then, maybe Chris needs to sit his ass down? I'm sure the Bengals have some depth on the bench that can take up the slack. Nah, we all know that's not true.